My name is Catrina and I am 23 years old. I have been married for 5 1/2 years and I have 4 small children. I got married when I was 17 years old and I had my first child at 18. I grew up in an alcholic home. For as long as I can rember my father has drank. When I was young I wittnessed my parents fighting and being verbally abusive. My father was never home and my mother took her frustrations out on me. She always was yelling at me and didn't want me around her very often. When my parents would fight I would get upset and bite myself. I was 7 years old. That is when the si began. When I became a teenager I would bruise myself or scratch myself. I broke my arm by banging it repeadedly in between a door frame. Then I reached adulthood and learned that cutting was more effective. I have had stitches over 6 times in less than a year. I have been hospitalized 6 times in a year. I have been diagnosed as bipolar. I have been on over 10 different medicins to help me. So far nothing has worked. I am on lithium wich helps some. I try to live day by day and have family near me. But they don't always understand and it is hurtful because they get mad at me. So that brings people p to date in my battle with si. I hadn't cut for 1 month and then i lost it. I couldn;t fight the urge anymore. But I lied and said I got cut doing dishes. That was to avoid the critism from my husband. |
